The same-ificaton of business communications is numbing

We are in the PR Apocalypse when two of the biggest banks use the SAME BOILERPLATE PHRASE responding to a report about turning a blind eye to Jeffrey Epstein accounts.

You know what phrase I'm talking about.

BANK OF AMERICA: "We take our legal and regulatory obligations seriously..."

DEUTSCHE BANK: “The bank takes its legal obligations seriously.”

The same-ificaton of business communications is numbing. 

It's like making the same plate of spaghetti and meatballs every night... for 50 years. Nobody believes it. It fades into the background. Which is what I am sure banks and other mega-corporations want.

"We take these matters seriously" has appeared online about 2,400 times in the past 7 days alone from when I wrote this.

Don't even get me started on “We take this matter seriously.”

“We take our obligations seriously.”

“We take these allegations seriously.”

“We take this issue seriously.”

“We are taking this very seriously.”

“We take compliance seriously.”

“We take our responsibilities seriously.”

“We are committed to cooperating fully.”

“We regret any concern this has caused.”

For all of these gems, you can, of course, thank lawyers -- the same people who brought us "We intend to fight this litigation vigorously."

Under U.S. common law, an apology or admission-adjacent statement can be introduced as evidence of liability in a civil suit. That's enough to make many attorneys hide under their bedsheets.

But it does not have to be that way. As a matter of fact, a well-crafted apology can mitigate all that — creating a very easy and inexpensive settlement (and maybe a dropped case) because often, an apology is all people want to hear. Apologies are more powerful than people think.

If you want to know where the mistrust of tech giants and large corporations has been sown, meaningless airball statements like these are like tinder in the fire.